Monday, December 3, 2012

Modernising my life....

So I decided I would crash tackle my way into the 21st Century by purchasing an iPad and an iPhone in one foul swoop.  Every time I bring out not one, but two crusty old Blackberry phones there is much guffawing and poking of fun and frankly I think my friends are bored with my inane ability to "handbag text" them fifty times a day with profound missives such as "uuugggppppuuuuu" and  "xyxyxyxyxyx"....I think Emergency Services are a little over my stalking calls too.  Also, the Blackberry has lost the ability to allow me to surf the net, check my emails or create a single "P" (the p button gets stuck and gives me a s-s-s-s-stutter) and also the delete button doesn't work, so all my friends think I am constantly drunk, when in reality I am just in a hurry or trying to minimise the P content of my text by finding roundabout ways of saying something without a word containing the letter P........

So I headed on into the Big Smoke on my own - on a mission.  Well, I tell you, there are Telstra Shops coming out of your arse when you don't want one, but try and find one and they are about as prevalent as those Sunbed Parlours they used to have in the 90's, before everyone realised looking like an Oompa Loompa had side affects not related to bad taste.  Eventually JB Hi Fi looked the go for an iPad.  Even buying one of those required a lot of discussion about sim cards and prepaid things and all sorts of shite, when really, anyone with half a brain would just suggest some kind of package where it is all thrown in and you don't have to look like a nong asking a whole heap of stupid questions.  Next, on a mission to find a shop that sells iPhones.  Came across Dick Smith.  Bought iPhone.  Paid man $29 to "set it up" for me.  Read, turn it on.  Then he proceeded to tell me how to download "apps", play games, check the weather and sync to my iTunes account.  Rookie error and all that, but he looked surprised when I asked him how I made a call and even more important, how to answer one.  Jeez and there was me thinking I was buying a PHONE!!!  Honestly.

So I had to spend all morning on the phone to two telecommunications carriers trying to get the bloody thing working.  How would I know what my user name is for my mobile phone?  I set it up in 1999 before the internet was invented.  Sheesh.  After all that I was exhausted and happy to hear the lusty chirrup of my Blackberry receiving a message.....

In other news, I went Kayaking at Balmoral Beach on Saturday, which I was really looking forward to.  Unfortunately having been out dancing to farewell another IT colleague, I was not feeling 100% and the mixture of the gently lapping waves, the curried tuna and brown rice breakfast, and the over consumption of cheap sauvingnon blanc played havoc with my tummy.   Suddenly I could not hold back and my stomach decided to throw up the curried tuna, brown rice and large long black in a series of noisy, messy and frankly very embarrassing heaves.  And of course being in a kayak, you cannot throw your body over to the side, or else you are in the water, and the last thing I wanted was to be in the water about a mile out to sea with no way of getting back in my (full of vomit) craft.  So I managed to puke all over this canoe, great first impression.  He very kindly pointed out that I had my mascara on my chin, and my eyes were doing an impression of Alice Cooper but apart from that, I think the day went ok.

I forgot to mention that in my purchasing of the my iPad I managed to bump into the man I had the six minute date with, the one I threw five dollars at, said it was lovely to meet you and ran away.  So that was the second embarrasing thing that happened this weekend. 

Anyway, I did RUN at the weekend too.  Despite having my achilles go to pot, I decided to try it out and went and did that Mountainsports 10km around Manly Dam.  As part of the Achilles Management Plan (AMP) I went for a swim in Shelley Beach afterwards (brrrrrr.....was frosty) and then had a massage, and then slept with a nitro glycerin patch on.  My achilles went from very swollen and pissed off after the race, to quite calm and serene this morning.  Those patches are magic.  Inflammation all gone.  Very happy.  You know that apprehensive first placement of foot on ground the morning after a race?  And usually you have to hop around for the first wee while?  Well there was none of that.  It was fine.  So have made appointment with Doc to get more.  Like the Junkie that I am.....

All in all, massive weekend, for one reason or another.  be it technology, first time kayaking, runs or swims.  But I had fun and bring on my new life.