Tuesday, November 25, 2014

4 months - give or take.....

So.  I did the Centennial Park Ultra.  50km for those playing at home. 

I ran the whole horrible thing, with one leg and foot totally numb from 25km onwards.  I changed shoes, I "favoured" my "good" leg and I totally fucked my Achilles.  After the race I literally hopped to the Bottle Shop for some liquid anaesthetic.  I woke up the next day unable to put my foot down.  I frantically googled "snapped Achilles" and learnt that if I could stand on my tiptoes - it wasn't snapped.  I could, but only just.  Here I am nearly four months later, feeling like today was my first proper attempt at proper running, still in pain, still troubled, but I dug out a very old playlist from the days when I used to run alone, cranked up some Green Day and despite a big massive effort and lots of huffing and puffing and trying to regulate my breathing, I GOT THAT EUPHORIC FEELING THAT YOU ONLY GET WITH CRANKING TUNES AND A BIT OF A LASH AT FANGING IT.  My version of FANGING IT clearly differs from most, but hell, it was fun.  So, as I ran up that particular piece of pavement, I thought about how often I had run up there telling myself I was going to get fit again, run again, enter races again, feel good running again.  But you know, it doesn't bloody matter how many times it's happened, how long I've been out, running is always there, it's sometimes a little out of reach, but it's always waiting and it's always always rewarding to make that leap of faith once more. 

All my running in the last few years has been strictly recreational.  No "training" - just social runs - sometimes this constitutes training and sometimes it doesn't.  I realised I haven't really run on my own for a very long time, and I haven't listened to music on a run since I can't remember when.  So it was actually really nice to have an old, rocking playlist, no pressure to keep up with anyone and an awesome feeling of euphoria and achievement by heading out alone on the Mean Streets of Blaxland ;)  Streets are easier than trail and at this stage of my fifty seventh "comeback" I need the confidence boost of an easy run to motivate me to keep going.  I am hankering for the days when I can ask my mates to run 20km in the bush with me and not worry about keeping up, but part of the fun will be getting back there.  If tonights rush of endorphins is anything to go by, it will just like one big massive snort of cocaine getting there.  OK ok, I have never had cocaine and there might be bits in between runs where things hurt but I'm seeing the positives, ok?!!  Allow me this indulgence......

Until next time, when I hope I am not reporting banjaxed lower limbs or a total lack of motivation...... :)


 

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