Jack White - Love Interruption

Really who hasn't felt like this...?

These lyrics are wonderful.

Perhaps with the exception of  "I want love to murder my own mother, take her off to somewhere, like hell or up above...."

Change

There is more change in the air than you could poke a stick at.  Makes for quite exhausting but never dull times. I suppose I go along with expectations of what the future will look like and recently it has been like a big dipper roller coaster ride of bumps and changes off course, and things popping up that I never ever expected to see in my life.  Not MY life.  Someone elses maybe.  Not MINE.

Anyway, in my role of "Parent of a Potential Rock Star" - I dutifully went to Hot Damn! on Thursday night to see Curt play.  They were amazingly good.  God to be 20 again.  It was good to see this place I had heard so much about, because "nightclubs" are a whole nother world in my life, but this place was almost identical to the dumps we frequented when we were in our teens.  To call it a nightclub is being kind.  But the atmosphere was great for the kids, everyone seemed to be having a great time, expressing themselves in their own quaint little way (moshing and flailing their arms wildly like someone half wise and jumping on each other AND at one point someone jumped on the lead singer, brought him to the ground and started rolling around the stage with him - the both emerged smiling, so I guess that is part of the show, who am I to question such antics?). 

Training went extremely well this week with three full on weights workouts and some interval training on the tready each time.  Now that I only weigh myself once a week, I was keen to see what was doing on the scales, given my tummy appears flatter and other wobbly bits are less wobbly.  So to see half a kilo register on the scales was pretty rewarding.  I am absolutely loving the weight training.  I still love my little runs too, I love that early morning run feeling too and I hope I never lose that, but the weights are so damn REWARDING.  And I don't feel like I could eat for Ireland afterwards.  And I love Matthu, he is a funny, kind and very helpful personal trainer.  He puts up with my grunting and giggling and changing session times every five minutes so I can fit in work and play and he never complains.  Plus he appears to be helping me getting the body I want so how could I not like him?

So - this week has been typical really.  Ups and downs.  Some very sad times, some good times, some wonderful news, labradors and weight training, music and vodka and all the other stuff I get up to. And SORE LEGS!  Good sore legs. 

Legs

Hurty legs.  Very hurty legs.  That eejit had me pushing out 140kg today.  But fuck it felt great afterwards.  Also I am doing the Dukan Diet.  So that means meat, meat and more meat.  With some eggs.

Today I felt all flu-ey and virusey.  Strangely after my leg session (honestly, Matthu my PT should consider midwifery, it is much the same line of work, all that grunting and groaning and calling him a bastard and then getting the giggles) I felt much better.  By teatime the virusy effect was back.  So got home and was supposed to have, surprise, surprise, MEAT for dinner.  After exploding a little bit of chicken all over the five hundred year old microwave in my flat, I decided to have a protein shake instead.  A little bit over meat.  So, the protein shake that is King of all protein shakes was made.  Chocolate protein powder, pure cocoa powder (which I managed to pour all over myself, if you are ever stuck for face powder, it doesn't look half bad once you rub it in,  but the smell is a bit of a giveaway) and a dollop of low fat cream (it has almost zero sugar but tastes sooooo decadent) and of course ice cubes.  I honestly considered adding a wee bit of vodka and pretending it was a wee cocktail, but refrained.  Only because I like to take my vodka in the bath, with pepsi (in the vodka, not the bath) and have a good book in my hand.  Although that always poses the dilemma of when to brush your teeth.  In the bath, before the vodka is finished?  Or wait till the voddie is down the hatch and hope you remember to do it later?  Dilemmas of a modern life.....

Anyway, at the weekend I had two wonderful runs.  One around the surrounds of the harbour, Kirribilli and Lavender Bay and one around the mountains with Simon.  Saturdays run was in the rain which I love.  Sunday was the perfect running morning, with fabulous company and just the best way to start the day.  I am devoting this week to my training.  Except for Thursday night when I am just carrying out my parental duties and attending "Hot Damn!" in Kings Cross where my erstwhile son is playing a gig.  A very heavy hardcore metal gig.  Should be fun :)

Shapewear

What an oxymoron.  Shapewear.

It should be banned.

Have this thing on that can only be described as a very tight slip.  Petticoat type thing, except EXCRUCIATINGLY tight.  In order to hold in places that aren't normally held in.  Like tummies and arse.

Well, it was a cold day, I was wearing a perfectly nicely fitting Leona Edmiston frock and I thought a bit of extra holding in wouldn't go amiss -  and anyway, it was cold.

Mistake.

These contraptions make you a freaking PECULIAR shape.

Firstly, I soon discovered I had four boobs, whereas previously I had two, nicely symmetrical, in the right place and if I do say so myself, a decent shape.  Not after Shapewear had its way with me.  Oh no.  Whilst my quantity has increased two fold, the quality is distinctly lacking.  Each one pillowy, with bits poking out in odd directions and generally making me look at bit like a Picasso, except not as funky.

Then there was the tummy and bum aspect.  Well this thing is a slip. It has a skirt.  Take two steps and the skirt has effectively ridden up to my waist, bunched up there and become a peculiar looking hump on my lower back and a suspect looking bundle of something on my waist, offset by whatever isn't being held in around my waist to be poking out hopefully underneath. This WASN'T exactly the look I was seeking.  Especially not in a figure hugging dress - a dress that challenges back fat, and tummies, and boobs and the like, with its only saving grace a pattern that confuses the eye on such matters.....

And being at a course all day I decided to bring along some sugar free lollies.  You know.  The ones that make your stomach swell up to twice its size and have you farting like a labrador for the next three days whilst your abdomen resumes from that overstuffed balloon state to its normal size?  So between the tightness of the "slip" and the excruciating wind element in my lower bowels, I spent the day pretty much in agony.

But at least I was warm.

Tomorrow, comfy knickers and a pair of stockings.  I'll let it all hang out.

Nerds

Life.  An amusing way to spend the time between higher planes.  Or coming back as a gnat.  Whatever the case may be.  I have spent the last 12 months searching.  I think that is how I would put it.  I guess the journey has been interesting, if not rather bumpy at times, and for a while I was a little confused as to what I was actually searching for.  So lots of things have happened and it has been an interesting time, with lots of gear changes and soul searching and decisions and bottles of vodka.  Have I found what I am looking for?  Maybe.  Am I going to keep searching - hell yes! There is so much more to discover in this life.   I think sometimes, instead of trying to pervert the course of "life" so to speak, you just got to let it wash over you and immerse yourself in it.  Maybe this is me learning not to worry about things.  I dunno.  This all makes perfect sense to me.  I am also learning to try and please ME and the people who are special and important, and stop trying to please everyone.  Living my life the way I want to is very important and I know now I need to be true to myself.  Keeping myself fit and healthy is a big part of this, and now that I actually have the time for a fitness routine, I am finding I am much happier and more balanced with this important aspect of life taken care of.  It has taken a little while to work all this out and I know the adventure is far from over, but all the jigsaw pieces seem to be fitting into place, although that might totally change tomorrow, because life has very much been like that recently.  I suppose I am better able to deal with it all, because I am learning now what is important and what is not. 

So - training.  What can I say?  I am LOVING being back into it.  Three great weights sessions at the gym this week with fantastic trainer man and three great little runs as well.  You know that feeling you get when it is cold and you've been running for about fifteen minutes, you are all toasty, gasping for breath and a great song comes on your iPod and you just KNOW you are alive?  I love that and have been planning my days so that I can fit in a run to get my "fix" again.  I seem to spend a lot of time in the disabled toilet in work getting ready for workouts or changed after workouts.  I have discovered an escape route that involves fire stairs and the lifts on level 9 that bypass the need to announce to everyone I am going to the gym - it just seems rude to be doing this in my lunch hour, but I guess I will get over it.....

I thought it was the formaldehyde in my makeup that was making my skin glow, but I think it might be the endorphins from all the exercise.  Interesting fact - put on some pimple cream then blowdry your hair.  You get a funny smell down your nose, like aircraft fuel.  Possibly the benzene in the pimple cream.  One sure fire way to set your hair on fire if you use too much.....

Took the Garmin out for the first time in AGES yesterday, a sure sign that the bug is kicking back in (running bug for any doubters).  I was pleased to see a negative split AND a kilometer at 5:45 pace.  Not that it means anything much but playing with numbers is one of my favourite passtimes.  Excel is my friend.  Pivot tables excite me beyond belief. 

This is the BEST album I have bought in an Ice Age.  Not a crap song on the whole album.  Brilliant to run to.  Nerds will rule the world one day you know.....

Success

Total lack of contemplation time, however, lots of training, not the running kind though.

Doing lots of weights, and suddenly, arse is getting smaller.  Todays Personal Training session was rather like childbirth.  You know that bit where he goes "go on - you can do it!" in a cheery sort of patronising way, and you just want to punch him in the face and tell him to shut the fuck up because you are in so much pain?  Well today was a bit like that. 

But, needless to say, I really enjoyed it.  In a sort of wierd, perverse way.

And felt bloody wonderful afterwards.

And, as Barry says.....anyone who is enjoying life, is a success......

Amen!

Cars + Me = Catalogue of Disasters

My Personal Legend (can you tell I am reading "The Alchemist"?) is telling me something.  Keep off the bloody roads.  That's what.  Between driving unexpectedly into a neighbouring car in the Woolworths Car Park (who drives into a parked car expectantly, mind you?) to the thing conking out going round a roundabout, to my tyres being slashed to me losing my license.  Are the gods who are guiding me telling me something?  Catch the fecking train!!!  Tonight I drove all the way to the city with only one headlight.  Last week I nearly ran over a motorcyclist (he just came out of nowhere).  Every time I say "this is the last wee thing that can go wrong".... it isn't.  I drive like a granny and despite that I lost my licence for speeding.  People give me the finger on the freeway for slowing them down.  Now that I have a city flat, I don't take the damn thing out during the week.  So I drive effectively twice a week, once to the city, and once to the mountains.  Surely this is adequate to keep the gods happy and me safe?  Oh hang on.  I did take it out.  For an early Personal Training session at the gym last week.  And parked in a no parking zone and got fined $208.  I rest my case.  Mathhew Mr Marvellous Personal Trainer told me all parking was free before 8am.  Liar liar pants on fire.  Anyway, that is just an observation.  I need a Tardis. Or a helicopter.

On the training front, I am getting into the weights big time.  Matthew (marvellous PT man) has me doing some interval training on the tready beforehand and this is about the extent of my running this week.  I intend to rectify this next week....but since moving into this flat and worrying about being lonely, I have never been busier in my life....no time to get lonely....it seems all my friends spend a lot of time in the city and when they are there....well they call me now....and I can't seem to say no to anything....well, why would I?  The plan was to get a life.  But I do want the balance of a fitness regime too....so went to the gym at the weekend...and really enjoyed it.  Actually, no, it was hard and I was wishing it was over, but afterwards I felt great.... ;)  Also decided not to rely on scales but listen to my waistbands!  There was fluctuation of a kilo at the weekend on the scales from one day to the next....but the tapemeasure is saying I have lost cms.....so I am taking that. 

So - this week, girlfriend from hospital days coming for dinner Monday,  girlfriend from pharma days coming Tues, Media Launch Wednesday!!  How exciting!  Our first!!  Monday and Wednesday have PT sessions but that is not going to be enough so the challenge is to fit in some decent little runs in between.....2 x 6km would be enough this week with something longer at the weekend.  Ok, so that is this weeks goal!! 

Frocks and stuff.

Ah life.  Where would we be without it hey?  (Don't answer that...)!

Still feel like I haven't settled down into a routine at the new digs yet, except to say I am coming home to the mountains totally exhausted and in need of massive amounts of sleep.  Not quite sure why....!! 

The course I am doing has finally started properly and is so much more interesting that I first thought.  In fact, I love the idea of it.  Love it.  However, being a true procrastinator and prolific reader, I cart my school work around with me, only to totally ignore it and finish a book on a totally unrelated subject cover to cover in a night.  Which isn't going to get me a Graduate Diploma.  I have to keep out of the bookshops, but that's like saying I will stay stop buying frocks from Cue.  Last week I read "Breakfast at Tiffany's" on Saturday and "A Perfect Stranger" on Sunday.  I know this is not helping my study but my curiosity got the better of me.  I have to find out "what happens".  Which is a bit like how I approach life.  I want to know the end before it has started pretty much.  I want to know all the details of how it will end up.  That's not to say I don't enjoy the journey, but I need to know where I am going.  I think that can frustrate my friends and family.  A bit too outcomes focused maybe? 

Anyway I am sort of loving the new life but sort of not.  It is hard to explain.  Last week was full on with being out almost every night, and being out almost always involves eating and drinking, and of course, one of the key reasons for getting the apartment was to spend the saved travel time getting fit (as well as studying).  But this week I've only done three workouts which is kinda shite given the time I have on my hands.  So next week needs to be more balanced.  The "honeymoon" is over!!!  I will admit that the PT session are fantastic and last week my legs were so sore after jumping up and down off a box, I could hardly drag calves up that hill.  But there is no denying it, I have put on a kilo since moving in and that is a BAD SIGN!  The good thing is that I can finally go out with my friends from work, and so Thursday went to half price cocktails with a guy from work and his friend - well I think I have made a great new friend, she is just like me, as Lachlan described it "you are both brunettes with big arses who like Cue Frocks".  Charming, but true.  We got on like a house on fire.  She's been in Sydney for six months having lived in Canberra previously, so we have made a pact to discover more of Sydney together.  Lots to fit in, and here I am sitting on my arse, not studying, not running, and not even buying Cue Frocks (which are now on line, oh, the temptation....).  Later.

Good running, sore legs

This week all happened the way it was meant to training wise, with the small hiccup of Anzac Day.  The training went something like this:

Sunday 8km run with Simon
Monday 6km morning run around the harbour (yes, Sydney Harbour!!! Was AWESOME!!)
Tuesday 6km morning run - again around the harbour, and again, was awesome.
Wednesday 8km walk.  Ok ok it was a pub crawl around Balmain.  But there was lots of walking.  And hills.  And beer.
Thursday.  Licking pub crawl wounds, feeling slightly sorry for self.  No training.
Friday.  Matthew the mad personal trainer weights session plus 20 mins intervals on the tready
Saturday.  20km in the National Park with Becky.

Plus every day 20 mins walking up Blues Point Road and 20 mins walking down.  Succumed to doing it in my gymshoes with my suit once only, decided I looked like a twat and surrendered to my bunions on the second day.  Or my potential bunions.  Or corns.  Or whatever they are called. 

So all in all pretty happy with how this week has panned out. 

I'm loving the PT sessions and have booked a second one for each week.  I'm embracing all the stairs and hills in my local area, although my legs are feeling very very sorry and sore today, as they are no longer used to this kind of palaver.  Stood in the icy water in the causeway after today which was fine until I went into the butchers in Glenbrook leaving a trail of dripping water on his clean floor. 

Tomorrow is an evening run with Simon then up bright and early to the city on Monday with a plan to drive in running gear, dump car, do run, then have shower etc and walk up big hill to work.  Should all work out ok if I leave at 5am.  Getting into the swing of a routine now, which feels good.  Also getting through some of the study, which also feels good.  On track!!

Farrrrrrrrkkkk

So.  I moved into my little city apartment.  God it was good going home on the first night, I was able to finish a late meeting, still go back to the office and check my emails, get my eyebrows waxed, go to the supermarket, go to Aldi (more about that later) and the newsagents and still get home before 7pm with the added benefit of a 20 minute cardio session (and a fecking resistance session after I hawked my dirty gym clothes, my shopping, my bottle of Grey Goose Vodka, my laptop and my handbag, full of newly purchased shampoo) down the hill. 

Then I got all the stuff organised in my new little home and moved things and then got tired of doing stuff and sat down and read the Who Horrorscope. Which says something nostalgic will happen this week and it will be nice.  So that's good then.

Training.  Well.  Am I feeling smug or what?  Three runs this week - all with Simon - 2 x 8km and 1 x 5km.  One spin class.  One PT session with the humble yet bloody awesome Matthew and lots of walking up and down Blues Point Road in high heels.  Which doesn't really count.  So my legs have that "sore but happy" feeling and I am not sure there is any better feeling when you start to feel your fitness coming back and you are plotting how to get your next run in.  And you know it is serious when you dust off the garmin that has sat idle for about six months, and find the charger under a pile of fake hairpieces you last wore in 1972 and you ACTUALLY CHARGE THE DAMN THING.  That's how you know you are starting to take it seriously again.  Next thing I will be entering stupid races.....  Anyway the plan was to stay home tonight and drive to the city in the morning, but that means no run in the morning, and I am keen to discover the foreshore in the early morning, so I will slip off tonight with my cushions and my lamps and my $12.99 coffee percolator ($12.99!!  can you believe that??) and my faux fur throw....you get the idea.  I have been picking up cute little inexpensive things to make it look warm and appealing and MINE. 

But now, I have to get my mosh on.  Curts band are playing a gig in the salubrious suburb of Blacktown later, so I have the black eyeliner on, an outfit that would be deemed appropriate for the moshpit, and EARPLUGS.

Oh and bought tickets for The Darkness!!!  As my good friend Pauly said "cock rock at its best..."

Put your arms around me....your dinner lady arms.....

Stuff

Starting to panic about changing my life so radically.  Get the keys Thursday.  Farrrk!  But really excited too.  In the sunshine the harbour is a fab place to be.  Today it poured and you couldn't even see the Bridge for the drizzle.  A cold, lonely flat on such a night maybe is not such a great prospect....

Anyway - I have decided to sort out my makeup and make two identical piles, one for home, one for the city.  Major Project.  I need a project manager, a Gantt Chart and a process map.  Next I plan to decide on which dresses to take.  Life can get so complicated.  And I've realised I cannot live without a blender or a percolator.  So there are more purchases to be had.  And do I carry all my perfume around in a basket in my car, because there is no knowing what smell I might want to be from one day to the next. 

So I googled "living in two houses" which were all along the lines of divorced dads and letting the kids have their favourite toys at one home.  It's kinda the same but not quite.  One website nattily suggested I take my entire spice rack and decant each jar into two jars.  Hello?  As if. 

Luckily John mentioned dresses and knickers, because I was so fixated on makeup, toiletries and makeup removal items I would have been likely to rock up on Thursday night with no clean undies and nothing to wear the next day.  Which would have been a terrible disaster, only ameliorated by an impromptu shopping session.  And I don't think they sell my particular brand of knickers in North Sydney. 

And I have been stressing about where I will get my Voodoo "Moondance" stockings in the big smoke.  I know EXACTLY where they reside in the Penrith Branch of Myer, but I've no idea about the city.  This is all going to be one big adventure. 

I checked out the veggie shop below our building today in more detail.  The problem is all the fancy, exciting things they sell, unlike Woolies Penrith Plaza that do your bog standard coffee, tea, nuts and bread.  This place has things I've never heard of, all kinds of exotic looking packages and boxes and thank god I will have to carry them all down the hill or else I"ll be spending a fortune and turn into a big fat cow.  And the idea is to use the extra 17 and a half hours exercising, sleeping or studying and not scoffing my face with international delicacies. 

On the fitness front I have run two nights in a row again with Simon, which has been great.  He is great company so we will have to keep making time to run together when I am here.  I like how we are running together now but soon he will be too fit again, and I will be too slow, so I guess it is good whilst it lasts.  I have a pump session planned tomorrow at North Sydney gym and then Friday with Matthew the personal trainer.  So a good week of exercise this week.  The only problem today has been I could have eaten a small dog and for the last six or eight weeks I have really managed my hunger and haven't craved food at all....except today.  I was just hungry all day and I suspect the 8km last night was to blame.  So tonights run we pulled it back a bit to about five km and then did some weights.  I need to find a distance that works but doesn't make me want to eat my own armpit.

It's never simple, is it?

Change!!!

Yesterday I finally got to use one of the personal training sessions I got when I joined the gym.  Matey has been ringing me for about six weeks now trying to pin me down to booking a session.  Every time he's rung I've either been drunk, asleep or in a meeting (or all three) so finally he pinned me down  Over the last two weeks I have been running with Simon again.  I love running with him because he keeps me honest and pushes me in a way that is very subtle - and of course we are busy chatting and giggling and so if it is a bit uncomfortable, I don't really notice that much because we are outside and in the fresh air and having a laugh.  The other good thing is that his fitness is shite too at the moment, so we are both in the "getting back into it" stage, rather than the "totally fit and could run for miles" stage.  Who am I kidding, I have never been at the I could run for miles stage...but you get the idea.  Anyway, running is fab, and the idea of a PT session was a bit ho hum - I wasn't all that enthusiastic, and just getting the time out from work can be stressful in itself.

So when I turned up to meet Matthew, my new trainer, I was in my stubborn little "we'll do this my way" mindset.  Hahahahaha.  So he tells me to hop on the treadmill and we can chat about "what I want to achieve" and so I let him have it.  No, we are not going to sit down and talk about my goals, no, I don't want you to try and sell me more sessions, no, you don't have to do an assessment to see how well I can do a clean and press and by the way matey, we are not here for a chat, I want to walk away feeling like I have worked out.  So lets get on with it.  Matthew had a little chuckle and asked if it would be ok in that case to just do some high intensity interval training.  I was over the moon at that suggestion and said, yes please.  So we did 20 minutes of alternating between sprints and walking on the treadmill.  So far so good.  He turned it up so fast I thought I was going to come flying off the back of it, but once I got into the rhythm it was really good.  Then he said we would do a weights circuit and so we did around ten exercises without a break, about seven times.  Which was all fine until I got the headspins and my eyes went funny and I went crosseyed and I thought I was going to pass out.  By this stage we were talking and laughing and were best friends, which is just as well because after my hoity toity start with Matthew it could have gone horribly wrong.  Anyway, I really didn't want to say anything because I asked for a tough session, but when my vision started to go funny and I really thought I was going to faint,  I had to ask him for permission to sit down and collect myself.  Which was rather embarrassing.  He was very nice about it and didn't bring up my earlier attitude but I did tell him "you win". ...  To which he laughed heartily.  Within about two minutes I was fine and we had a nice cool down on the tready and I have already signed up for next weeks session.  And yes, I really did feel like I'd done a good workout.  I have a new best friend.

The other really good news is I have now got myself a place in North Sydney to live during the week.  (And judging by the location, I suspect at the weekend as well....).  I've been grumbling about the commute for ages now....it can take up to four hours a day on trains, and to be honest, I get tired.  In the summer it really isn't that bad, but last winter was quite horrible, cold, windy train stations at very early hours, numb feet, smelly sardine eating commuters, you name it, it's happened.  It's fair to say that commuting in the winter sucks.   So - I asked my lovely employers for a pay rise - enough to cover a nice flat in the city.  And guess what?  They gave me it!  And so I have found a little apartment in McMahons Point (right on the harbour, with views of the Harbour Bridge and Luna Park from the windows) and I sign the lease next Friday!  I can't wait!!!  Walking up Blues Point Road from the harbour after I had viewed the property was what sold it.  It is right in the middle of a big busy city but it is so peaceful and quiet and the birds were singing and it just felt right.  So now I will have a ten minute walk to work and I can run in the mornings and go to the gym after work, and get about on ferries and catch taxis and go to supermarkets without trolleys and car parks and see what it is like to live in the middle of a big city as opposed to suburbia.  Can't wait!!!

Twice is not a habit but it's getting there....

Two morning runs in a row with Simon.  Two fantastic mornings.

Truly the best way to start the day, the best beauty treatment you can get and the best cure for anything is running along, nattering, enjoying the morning smells, sights and sounds and then going to work with that fabulous feeling of having done something for yourself before the madness starts.

I truly believe that vaseline and a run are the best (and cheapest) beauty treatments around, my face just seems to have everything in the right place after a run, my cheeks are red and my skin just looks more alive.  Must be all that huffing and puffing I do....

Anyway, apart from that Simon and I are both unfit and gasping for air up the hills and remembering when we were fitter and could zoom up those hills (well, he was remembering that, I was thinking to myself, I freaking hate hills).  We promised ourselves a stop and a stretch at the top of the hill, at the 4km mark, then we'd turn round and run home.  Bloody hell, that was a challenge, then at the top of the hill was a man who must have been in his eighties, walking stick in hand, back curved with age, posture stooping over.  But there he was out for his morning walk, laughing at the pair of us gasping for air whilst we pretended to stretch against a lamppost.  Which reminded me how lucky we are to have our (relative) youth and fitness and the ability to just get out there and do it. 

Acceptance

Do you encourage someone who wants to motivate you?

Do you dump someone who wants you to be perfect?

How much is enough?

Where is the line between your motivation and their own motivation?

Or do you just  hang out with people who accept you as you are and love you for it?

Contemplation

I've been doing lots of contemplation of late, the meaning of life, is there life after death, was the universe created or was there a big bang, and will anyone ever forgive me for vomiting up red wine on that white carpet at Vegan camp two years ago and being so drunk I went to bed and forgot about it?

Blaxland to Springwood to Winmalee and back via pushbike!

Another weekend sort of zoomed on past without as much as a bye your bye.  Or whatever the saying is.  Bloody hell, I will be seventy five before I know it.....life is just getting busier and time is just flying past.


Two nights out in a row normally mean absolutely no training for me, but this morning got up and did lots of garden work and then a fantastic bike ride.  It is funny how friends show you things.  I believe every single one of my friends is here to teach me something or show me something.  Some more than others.  Some very deep and important lessons, some lighter and more fun, but I believe that is why people come into your life.  And deep down, we are all here to learn and grow and help others learn and grow.  That's just how it is.  Or should be.

So Karon, god bless her, who is terrified of freeways, showed me the back way to Springwood last week when we drove up there to have lunch.  And as we are driving, I was thinking.....SUPERB BLOODY BIKE TRACK - with a few hills, I'll be in that.  I dunno about you, but riding round and round the same track is as boring as sin, but it is SAFE.  (Actually, when was sin boring?).  And going on the roads on my bike scares the living shite out of me.  But this was quite a good "beginners" ride, with enough need to signal, stop, etc to be good, but so little traffic to be a little bit safer.

Anyway, it is all uphill so the gradual climb was bloody excellent, and all those spin classes must have helped.  I am still chicken with the speeding downhill, but tried to keep my hands off the brake and just coast, at times I managed it, at times I nearly shit myself, but that is ok. 

So up to Springwood, and along Richmond Road to Winmalee is a terrific little ride - so when I am pushed for time and can't afford to get to the M7 or Homebush or The Lakes, there it is.  I had no car today on account of that eejit and my tyres incident so had to improvise. 


The achilles is still sore despite no running since last week - so I just thought I would let that one go.  My zen moment in the bush last week was great, but I fancied something different today.  Amazing what you see from a bike that you would never notice from a car, and I loved the journey today.  Perfect day.

Rocking Tuesdays

I know everyone else hates Mondays, (especially Bob Geldof) - but I love them.  I am not always keen to get out of bed to greet them, but once up, out there and embracing all that a Monday has to offer, it is really quite good.  First of all there is coffee. Ok, it is a bit of an addiction, but I just love my first coffee of the day and enjoying innocent pleasures is one of my favourite passtimes.  Enjoying naughty ones is another but that doesn't always fit with Monday mornings (although has been known to happen.....).  I have Spin class with Tony at 12, so I only really have to shuffle stuff around on my desk for three hours, talk to people and ask them about their weekend for a while until I get there.  The expenditure of all that energy seems to vitalise, no matter what I've been up to at the weekend, and then I get to have a nice shower and fix myself up and spend the afternoon planning and strategising with my favourite colleagues.  I do love them, they make me laugh, they show me exciting stuff and we have a giggle about stupid things, and I always come away feeling good.  Yes, I love Mondays and Bob Geldof was wrong. Maybe playing in a band made Mondays crap because they didn't have a gig?

Tuesdays, on the other hand, don't always have the same appeal.  Firstly, we have a boring meeting at 12 which means I cannot get to the gym.  But mainly because we have a boring meeting and we have been having the same meeting for a year and it makes it feel like Groundhog Day and it never changes and afterwards we all talk about it being a reality show and we are the cast and we just don't know it.  Think - The Truman Show.   Did I mention it affects my ability to get to the gym?  But today I challenged boring Tuesdays by wearing the most colourful red dress, red suede knee high stilletoe boots and a very big cheeky grin.  By the end of the day I was feeling cheeky and grinny and the sun came out and it is the last day where day is longer than night and it made me feel good.  And I wore my super mood enhancing body lotion and all was ok when I got a whiff of myself.   And the man in the hairdressers said my boots were the perfect antidote to boring Tuesdays and I think he was right.  People were especially nice to me today.  Could they tell I needed a lift?  Or was it just the boots?  Or am I imagining things and people are always nice? 

Anyway, that little secret place in my heart that has the joy and the sadness and the pain and the calmness and the peace was tickled today.  Always a good way to live.  A little bit of joy, a little bit of sadness and a lot of strength and more than anything, a lot of hope. 

Saosin - I wanna hear another fast song [instrumental]

Back

I am doing the best that I can right now, and I think I am doing a great job.  But I have lost something that was incredibly important to me, and I cannot share that with anyone at all. 

My attempts to meditate continue to frustrate me yet encourage me.  If that is possible.  It gets a little easier and yet I know I haven't nailed it yet.  I guess it is a bit like running.

So - running.  Three runs last week.  Then a break and a spin class and a pump class.  Lots of physical activity happening, lots of nice endorphins flowing.  Planning on going to the Circa run on Sunday with Steve, Janis, Ray and Co, and looking forward to seeing everyone again.  It is a bit like a long lost family, and a culture and community that I was once part of, but moved away from.  I guess now is the time to reclaim it. 

Met some old friends tonight, god it feels like I have been on Saturn for the last six months.  I have forgotten everyone I loved and cherished.

Life moves in the most mysterious ways, but sometimes we know.  We just know what is coming, and maybe it is not that great but we prepare ourselves and we adjust and we overcome and we look back and we think "it is ok".  Because it really is ok.

I've run three days in a row and then done a spin class today.  The running has been brilliant.  Friday I ran alone.  Saturday morning I met up with about ten other kindred spirits to test out the new Sydney Marathon Clinic course.  It is great and it was a fantabulous morning.  The sky was blue, the air was crisp and there was still a pale full moon in the sky.  The running was superb, the company excellent and nothing could have gotten me back into the running vibe better.  Loved it.  Loved it.  Did I say I loved it??

Sunday ran with Kelly.  It was a bit more subdued due to a late night dancing on the grass and drinking vodka and generally being childish but having fun with old friends.  Running in the midday sun after a big night isn't such a great idea. 

Today, a spin class with Tony - which was excellent.  Life is good.  Life is good.